Happy Valentine's Day

I have a confession to make.

Since that day your first mail dropped into my inbox, I never thought any further than you and I being friends.

We only met during wedding reception dinners of our mutual friends before. You always seem to be sitting across from me, on the same table. Did you know, that your radiance never failed to catch my eyes. It must have been those eyes of yours that danced in the dim lighting of the hall, and your smile that intoxicated all living things around you. And I couldn't help but think to myself, wouldn't I be so lucky if I can get to know you. Ok ok, what I was really thinking was, lucky bastard... that date of yours sitting beside you.

Heh...

I would have invited you for a drink, but for the courtesy of my date then, who is very easily green-eyed, I discarded the thought. Yet, two hundred and six days after that very first letter, here I am, finding myself in a new blog, writing, feeling, thinking of you.

I know... I can't share my life with you, not right now, least to say. Hence, I want to create something; something dedicated entirely to you, only you. Something... that just doesn't last for a day, or two, or even weeks. No no... I intend to do this until the very last day of my existence. Gosh, I can really be overly dramatic? Perhaps one day reality should bore its weight upon us, breaking the bubble I am floating in now, sending me straight to the ground, mercilessly. But right now, honestly, I don't really care. Right now, all I have is that edgy, yearning desire in my heart. For you.

So I thought, wouldn't it be perfect if I can present this to you as a gift on Valentine's Day. Of course, I risk the possibility of you scorning back at me thinking what a total miser I am. Blogspot as a gift? Doesn't Google give it out for free, I can almost hear you say under your breath. Haha... perhaps. Who knows, maybe one day, long after I descended the stairs of the underworld, this piece of literary crap I am writing here may find its way to the reading community. I am not kidding, if ever this thing generates any sort of goodness other than your reading pleasure, I hereby declare all benefits be yours.

So here I am, my darLing, I open myself to you. Into these pages, I pour my thoughts, I surrender my hopes, my ups and downs, and nothing else but my love to you. Oh wait... is this love? I don't know, to tell you the truth. I really don't know. I have fallen in love before so many times I think I am either numb or confused by the notion of it. Is it just a concept, nurtured by man to justify the feeling of fondness towards another, or just a raw emotion of desire and lust? Maybe it is both, or neither. What I do know, is this pounding sensation in the cavity of my chest, lifting me higher and higher everytime I think of you, flaming the desire to be near you, to bathe in the presence of you.

Happy Valentine's Day, my darLing. \('¤')/